Dep'er with an issue

[bnpwalt]

So Ive been waiting to be shipped out to RTC since Aug. of 07. I ship out in a week and now many issues have came up. 1 my father was diagnosed with cancer and now that i will be leaving my mother and my little sister will be taking care of everything. My brother is currently on the USS Nimitz and they are on a 6 month deployment. We are aware that we can send a red cross msg for him to be here when my father has the surgery but he will be spending a lot of $$$ to fly back from Asia. 2. A job that i was waiting for a while now has come up. I have a very good possability of getting this job. and 3 I just dont feel the same anymore about leaving. When I signed up I was very excited about leaving and traveling and having to deal with CO's and Officers (joke) but now Im seeing that my family should be first. Im still young and I can rejoin if I wanted to. I might have waivers for this reason but oh well. In all my question is can I still back out of my contract that I signed when i went to MEPS the first time? thanks

[NavyMomx2]

I can understand your apprehension on leaving when your dad is ill and leaving your mom and sister to take care of him.

I don't know if at this point in time you can back out, with your ship out date so close. A good question for your recruiter. You may want to see if you can push off leaving - after your dad's surgery. Remember why you wanted to join and then discuss this with your family and find out their feelings.

Is this job offering you all the things the Navy can? Will you travel to exotic lands, meet interesting people, challenge yourself, accomplish in just eight short weeks, what most of your friends will never do in a lifetime? Don't give up a chance of a lifetime before you talk things over with your folks and your recruiter.

Okay, now that I sound like a Navy Recruitment Ad...sorry about that. Just think long and hard before you give up this opportunity - talk with your family and then follow your heart.

Hope this has helped in some way....even though I rambled.

[KYmom]

Don't have a definte answer for you, But I was under the impression that you had till your final swear in. Talk to your recruiter and explain the situation with your father. I am sure he will understand and work you. Even recruiters have parents. Prayers for your father. The recruiter should be able to explain your options regarding this matter.
I was under the impression you could stay in dep for one year. Hopefully maybe things will be better before your time frame is up.

[bnpwalt]

Well see Im 23yrs old and its not really my familys decision if i should leave or not. This was a choice of my own. Even my brother who is in the Navy has not pressured me into anything. Thank you for your prayers. With the new job i will be traveling alot around the U.S. maybe a min. of it out of the country.

[Kristie]

Welcome.....yes you can be in DEP for up to one year....and the only advise I can give it is to talk to your recruiter and see what he has to say.....

I will be praying for your family, I know that this is a very difficult time for you....

[Retired Navy Chief]

Sorry to hear about your fathers cancer diagnosis. That is always hard news to hear.

All in all .... this sounds more like a case of cold-feet & "buyers remorse" more than anything else. Happens a lot, especially for young people who are in DEP for quite a while.

A couple questions for you .... what does your dad want you to do ?? Do you think he wants you to put your life on hold because of his illness ?? Have you asked him ?? Sit down with him and have a heart-to-heart with him ... you may be surprised what he tells you. My gut feeling is that he would want you to finish what you started and honor your commitment.

Would his illness mean that you would be financially responsible to take care of your mom and little sister ?? If so, talk to your recruiter about making them YOUR dependents so that they would be eligible for benefits in the Navy. That would be a very good way to take care of your family responsibility. Your brother can find out about this as well since he is already in.

This other "job" that is waiting in the wings .... it would have to offer a LOT in the way of education, travel and benefits to even come close to matching what you will get in the Navy. Think about your tech school just to learn your Navy job .... very, very few companies offer that kind of quality training to new hires and you will be getting PAID to do it !!
I suggest that you take a minute and write down all that this new job can offer you and then take it to your recruiter. Spend some quality time with him/her and let them refresh your memory on what the Navy can do for you. Weigh the pro's and cons of both ... before you do something that could have lasting consequences.
Talk to the recruiter about the worst case scenario that you envision regarding your father's situation and ask them to tell you how the Navy would address this. Compare that info with what the other job will do. I lost both of my parents while I was on active duty ... so I know the answer to this question. Who is going to take care of YOU so that you can take care of your family ?? (Ask your recruiter and brother about the Family Services Center and what they do for Sailors).

Ultimately partner, the decision is yours and yours alone. Just know that you are not the first one to run up against these kind of obstacles and that there are far more resources available to you in the Navy to help deal with these kind of family issues than there will be anywhere else.

Good luck with your decision,
PISTOL